What is true happiness? Is it always smiling, and showing no other emotion? During quarantine, I discovered that a person cannot just be happy. Everyone has something going on, but not everyone wants to share it. I used to be the type of person who would put a smile on my face no matter what happened, since I do not like to show myself in a vulnerable state. However, recently, so much has been going on that it was inevitable that this "happiness" would end.
A couple of days ago, I realized that I had stopped doing what made me happy during quarantine. This realization has helped me reflect on how I have been dealing with things. I began to remember what made me happy, as well as all the things that were a part of the “happy” me. I used to make myself laugh by thinking of jokes and just being around people made me happy; it took a lot to get a smile off my face. Recently, I had forgotten about all of these things that used to be a part of my life, the things that made my days a little brighter. It is just so hard to imagine how one thing, no matter how big or small, can cause such a huge impact in your mood.
I am not going to tell you that everything is magically going to change overnight with small changes. It takes time and effort to discover what is really going on and how to fix it. I am not saying that being sad is bad, not at all. Sometimes it is okay to just cry. However, there are things that can hold you back, so you should not stay hooked onto those things. Sometimes it is better to just let go of them and to be free, because until you do, you will not know how much they are holding you back. It might hurt or it might feel that letting go is not the right decision. Even so, I have learned that in the long-term, letting go and focusing on your well-being should be your number one priority, and you will be happier.
Life will always surprise you. You may not always realize in the moment that something is bad for you. The key thing is to learn to differentiate between what is good and bad for you. Little by little, you will start to feel better about yourself if you can isolate a problem and find a solution. Even if it might seem hard at first, the end results will be worthwhile. You will feel like a completely different person and wonder how you let those bad things sneak into your life; ultimately, you will feel proud of yourself. You will look back and see how much you overcame and how important it was to keep going in order to find your true happiness.
Life is unpredictable. That might be scary, but you have to know that you are strong enough to fight whatever life throws at you. It may seem like you have reached a dead end, but everything will be okay; someday, you will thank yourself for how much you fought. Most importantly, do not forget that it is completely normal not to be happy all the time, we are only human. If your well-being becomes your number one priority and you incorporate little things in your life that bring you joy, you can increase your happiness.